Walking in Disobedience

It has been more than a month since I last wrote anything. I have found myself making excuses, blaming various reasons for my lack of action. Deep down, I know these excuses are nothing but falsehoods, yet I allow them to linger in my mind. The voice of the enemy whisper's doubts, telling me that I am not capable or qualified to write. It questions the depth of my faith, insinuating that my insights are not valuable enough. And then there's the procrastination, the promise to write later, a promise I keep pushing back. I've convinced myself that the timing of my obedience to the Lord doesn't matter, as long as I eventually follow through. But I now realize that this mindset is a form of disobedience in itself. I've been deceiving myself, thinking that reading the Bible and spending time with God somehow compensates for my disobedient actions in other areas of my life. I've been living a contradictory existence, believing that I cannot be in communion with God while walking in disobedience. The enemy's lies have seeped into my thoughts, clouding my judgment and feeding me destructive narratives. Despite spending time in God's presence, I have allowed these lies to take root, choosing to listen to the enemy's voice over the loving guidance of my Heavenly Father. It's a perplexing realization – the Scriptures speak truth, yet I have chosen to heed the whispers of my flesh. I constantly battle with feelings of unworthiness, inadequacy, and lack of gifting. And in a way, these feelings are valid if viewed through a human lens. However, the deeper truth is that I am a cherished child of God, filled with His Spirit. With the Holy Spirit dwelling within me, I am indeed worthy, special, and equipped with the necessary gifts to fulfill my calling. It's a paradox of truths, a tension between human frailty and divine empowerment that I must navigate with faith and humility.

One of the chapters of the Bible that I find incredibly comforting and insightful during challenging times is Ephesians 6. In this chapter, the apostle Paul eloquently discusses the profound concept of putting on the armor of God as a means of spiritual protection and strength. It's a powerful metaphor that resonates deeply with me as I navigate through the trials and tribulations of life. Reflecting on my own experiences, I realize that there have been instances where I found myself right in the midst of a spiritual battle without even recognizing it. The subtlety of spiritual warfare can be both intriguing and alarming. Sometimes, the signs are crystal clear, while at other times, the realization dawns upon me only after the storm has passed. It's during these intense moments that I understand the necessity of arming myself with spiritual weapons, as outlined in Ephesians 6. Although I have revisited this passage multiple times during my life, I've come to acknowledge that merely reading the words is not enough. The true essence lies in embodying and "putting on" the armor of God on a daily basis. The unpredictability of life underscores the importance of being spiritually prepared each day. Therefore, I've cultivated a habit of reciting verses 10-20 every morning before stepping out of bed. This practice serves as a powerful reminder that, regardless of the challenges that may come my way, I am already equipped with the divine armor. Through the empowering presence of the Holy Spirit, I find solace in knowing that I possess spiritual authority. It's a realization that propels me to speak truth and life into my thoughts and actions, thereby reinforcing my stance in the spiritual realm. By embracing the teachings of Ephesians 6 and embracing the armor of God, I strive to navigate through life's battles with courage, faith, and unwavering conviction.

Ephesians 6: 13-18, “Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one; and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints.”

Lord, I am grateful for the protection provided by the armor of God.